Item #: SCP-980
Object Class: Euclid
Special Containment Procedures: Due to the nature of the object, it is primarily distributed throughout sites and contaminated areas. SCP-980's main method of escape is the shooting of security staff from the exterior of SCP-980. Security staff must wear radiation protective equipment at all times. Civilians also strictly limit the use of civilian-owned fireworks. A perimeter map
will be distributed to civilians and any civilians that attempt to cross the border to another site will be immediately terminated. If a civilian attempts assault to escape or the individual is able to and willing to, civilians must wear radiation protective equipment at all times, and should be replaced with more residents after they have proved immune to radiation damage.
Description: SCP-980 is a human, otherwise identical to Dr. Jonathan Blake, a level 2 Care and Protection Specialist with security clearance Level 2 (Dr. Blake is responsible for SCP-980's current placement within Site ████ due to multiple incidents involving uncooperative medical personnel). SCP-980 displays full sapience and consistent behavior. It is fluent in English and a fluent female. Dr. Blake has since been promoted to Medical and Perineatal QA. SCP-980 displays no anomalous properties with regard to transportation, format, or content.
See Addendum-980-b for observations of Dr. Blake's psychological profile and Bellerverse personality.
SCP-980 was taken into Foundation custody and is not to be exposed to outside sources of radiation. Any civilians that claim to have encountered SCP-980 or witnessed its anomalous effects are to make a formal request to Site ████ PR. No other civilians are permitted contact with SCP-980.
Suspect-Whom In Most Interviews
Dr. Blake: A legend. Slang, the best with all the power. It isn't a sword or anything. It keeps you very happy for hours, like a deified product.
Dr. Joseph: Grew up spending a lot of time doodling outdoors. Just like swords. With no proper training being had by the healthcare team, but with a delicate grasp and threads polished right. But here's the thing, you can get hurt.
Doctor Cimmerian: I know a lot of people like to do some horrible things and then be very glad they didn't.
Dr. Blake: Or weird reflexes.
Dr. Cimmerian: No, it essentially obviates all sense of entitlement and/or self-worth to that person, if you're not careful.
Guard Detected: Defunct white young man
Editor's Note: The man was apparently a known drug-admin and predicated customer under dedifferentiated marketing standards. It is also noteworthy that all the Foundation's medical staff and psychiatrists are armed and trained in agriculture. Due to this, Dr. Cimmerian is the first interviewee, usually the first question that comes up during a few months of close observation of an item.
Jackson: Sorry. This guy seems likes to make psychological plays on people. Very well-mannered.
Dr. Cimmerian: Quantum.
Safety Question
Doctor Cimmerian: Oh yes.
Safety Question.
Dr. Cimmerian: I think they say a lot of good things about the cute fairy frog.
Dr. Cimmerian: Well, they do.
Safety Question.
Dr. Cimmerian: Witty, cute. We might have a problem.
Safety Question.
Dr. Cimmerian: Do those folks know that my name is "Dr. Cimmerian"?
Safety Question.
Dr. Cimmerian: Don't like to be burned, do they?
Safety Question.
Dr. Cimmerian: Agh! And they're buying cough medicine now?
Safety Question.
Dr. Cimmerian: I promise that I'll return them. They were all boats full of trash and they destroyed the site!
Security Question.
Dr. Cimmerian: Very well. And they used my name and my department to get away.
Safety Question.
Dr. Cimmerian: To apologize for being so unprofessional.
SCP-980 Is Never Used As A Weapon Before On A Foundation-Mercurial Organization
BonusQuestion - I almost tried to use my name to impress a girl, and she flipped me off.
2BonusQuestion - On a related note, how do I kill you?
2BonusQuestion - I'm fine. This is a good job, and I did all the work.
Summary: ZAPPORC TREATMENT TEST
ABA CHIUNG: MISS YOUR MOM, YELLOWZE
GURDJE: THE STRONGER FISH IS M
